Today we are discussing Workplace Bullying.
Have you heard about this? I thought it is only a worry at my kids' school. Surely it is not at work? What is it? Maybe it is a myth?Is it only Top Down (boss/ employee) or can it be between employees / team members?
Watch these videos :
Intro : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OgMEF0mAFXo
Discussion on what a bully is: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tlB1pFwGhA4
How do we deal with a bully without becoming a thug (general overview) : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sgWyolwBGgE
a GREAT 4.4million view Testimonial : www.youtube.com/watch?v=sgWyolwBGgE
Have a fabulous day!
ciao ciao
Letta!
Wow, interesting videos on bullying .... really sad to know people can take their own lives because of this ....makes me more aware of my behaviour towards others .
ReplyDeleteBullying in the workplace is common where some employees tend to think they know more than others, instead of trying to assist their fellow employees they tend to make fun of them. We need to use our EI in these instances and rather than make a fool of people we should try and teach the employees who are unsure of something the correct way to carry the job at out. Employees that bully others need to be made aware of this as it causes animosity in the workplace and can eventually lead to employees leaving the company due to them being unhappy. The bully needs to be tamed!
ReplyDeleteWell said Ian. I agree with you. This needs to become a lifestyle for everyone of us.
DeleteIan
DeleteWell Said. I agree 100% that they should be made aware as the animosity you talk about grows and grows....then what happens.
Not good for the company or morale.
Yip - the bully must be told and tamed!
DeleteWorkplace bullying can include such tactics as verbal, nonverbal, psychological, physical abuse and humiliation. This type of aggression is particularly difficult because, unlike the typical forms of school bullying, workplace bullies often operate within the established rules and policies of their organization and their society.
ReplyDeleteWorkplace bullying can be any of the following:
Shouting at someone - whether in private, in front of colleagues, or in front of other people
Name-calling
Belittling and making someone feel unimportant
Being treated with disrespect
Excessive monitoring
Constant nitpicking/criticising/flying off the handle especially over trivial or minor matters or mistakes
Making someone feel bad and ashamed
Deliberately overloading someone with work
Undermining someone such as setting them up to fail
Purposefully withholding information which is needed for the person to do their job efficiently
Excluding someone from normal workplace/staff room conversations and making someone feel unwelcome (this also includes cliques)
In my opinion I do not think that bullying only happens between the bosses and workers, but also between workers themselves.
So, I identified the definitions of bullying.
Will someone else identify what a bully is?
Elsabe, better said than that, nobody can!!. I agree fully with all the facts stated. The only thing I think has been left out is the language barrier that we experience. That to me is also bullying, The drift of the conversation is their but the full "BULLYING" cannot be understand. Thank you for a wonderful, insightful opinion.
DeleteA bully is someone that belittles,degrades, and tramp on other people to gain something for themselves.
DeleteOr it can be a person that refuses to accept change and bullies his opinions onto others.
I can go on but i think that that is the just of it.
Amanda, you raise an interesting point.
DeleteBut just a quick Q: How does one then know it is bullying if one does not hear it (language barrier)?
How does one know it is even directed at them?
Tsegofatso
DeleteThat is a tough question to answer. I sometimes say this..." if people stop talking about me i will get worried..as if they deem me important enough to talk about.."
Lukas, I just do not understand the issue of language barrier in the context of bullying!
DeleteHi all..
ReplyDeleteThis is deep stuff...when i started watching the first video...a couple of things flashed before my eyes.
I was bullied at school and told im worthless....not a good place to be....and it wasn't just by school mates but teachers as well. I was taught from an early age that strict but fair is right..My dad and i thank him for that....so i opened my mouth at every turn to stop ,or try stop, favoritism. Didn't work so well.
Never thought about Bullying will be in the work place....but some of the points made by Clive Boddy made me think of my situation and i see thing differently.."smoke Screen fights so he looks like the hero". ect ect ect...im frowning because i have never thought of it in that way...I also see that i have been one to bully to get my way...so i will be more cautious in how i approach certain situations in future. I also see that it isnt always your boss or superior that does bullying i see that juniors bully bosses they don't like by being counter productive and stubborn on purpose.
Scilla is right..in saying that to change it we have to change our self first..i have always tried to turn the other cheek. Sometimes i got beat up badly. Using your anger to focus better on the job at hand and bettering yourself this way is soooo true. She lifted a couple of very interesting point.
To be able to handle bullying you should do the following.
1. Change yourself first,sit and get to know yourself.
Get inner power.
Use your anger as a fuel.
Work with other people in your position without being bullies yourself.
If i look at all of these. Go on your knees and ask God for wisdom. He is our creator and knows best on how to help us.
Lukas. I applaud you !!!!!
DeleteAgree with Elsabe!
DeleteI see today's topic is very hot.
ReplyDeleteI can only imagine why..All of us have either been bullied at one stage or maybe just maybe some of us have in a way manipulated(bullied) someone to gain something for ourselves,.
Bullying in the workplace is unfair discrimination, dignity violation or unfair labour practice. Many of us, if not all, have experienced this - either being the bully or being bullied.
ReplyDeleteVery HOT topic!!
My question though is, how does one deal with this:
ReplyDelete1. If the bully is your co-worker?
2. If the bully is someone in a higher position?
Thanks for your comments everyone, I normally find that the Bullies normally have deep psychological problems that may have come from upbringing and they think that their behaviour is normal, their way of dealing with their frustrations is to take it out on other people and this probably happens at home as well as in the workplace. Serious counselling should be considered for these people.
ReplyDeleteThe fact that they are not aware, or even aware but unconcerned about their behaviour means that they may not even be interested in counselling.
DeleteMy answer on both your questions will be this Tshego:
ReplyDeleteThe best method is to realize you have no control over them and there is nothing needed to be said to them. After all, bullies are jerks and if you tell them they are a jerk they will continue harassing you because they already know they are jerks! The best way to deal with a bully is identify the people who you know are and always be on guard.
We know they're in the office and we know they are going to upset us. But knowing this we are prepared for them and not intimidated by their actions.
When being bullied or harassed by a work colleague put your hand up to them, you then say to the person, "STOP. You are harassing/bullying me, I do not like the nature of your tone and request you stop speaking in this manner immediately".
Carry on being yourself and carry on feeling good about yourself - Don't believe the rubbish they say and don't let them stop you being you.
Hope this answers your question..! Anyone els want to comment on this? Lukas?
The 'STOP' approach may be easy if you are dealing with a co-worker.
DeleteCan you really say that to your direct manager: "STOP, I don't like the nature of your tone?" I can't imagine it being easy.
Tshego, I personally think that you can!!! Why tolerate bullying from your manager in the workplace where it is suppose to be a "work friendly" environment. Don't get me wrong when I say "work friendly" because I know that stress levels can be high in the workplace from time to time, and emotions run high, but that it is not a good reason for any manager to be a bully...
DeleteMany people still hold views such as "why don't you stand up for yourself?" My answer would be 'because the moment you assert your right not to be bullied the bully moves into the next 'phase', which is -elimination- and "if you can't stand the heat get out of the kitchen"!!
DeleteReally a tough one when the bully is a manager! Impasse maybe?
Tsegofatso. If you watch the last video again you will see that there is a couple of things that you can do if it is a manager. Get other people to stand with you...do not retaliate in anger...you have to stand up for yourself...and if it is not only you being bullied your co workers will look up to you and stand with you......
DeleteWe all have rights and this is asserting your rights to not being bullied.
Good point Lucas - that's if the action is not seen as 'ganging up' against the manager.
DeleteStill feel that it is a problem if there is only one person being bullied. The other people who witness the constant bullying may not be willing to assist with the fear of being a victims.
For the moment I am sharp. Nobody has bullied me :-)
ReplyDeleteWhat an insightful exercise...we have our work cut out for us. A stronger workforce is a more productive one :-)
ReplyDeleteA prevoius boss of mine was a bully and screamed and shouted at all the staff.
ReplyDeleteMany of the people have left and some are planning to leave. He has still not leant from this...
Mike
DeletePeople that dont learn from their mistakes doesnt want to learn...I am sure you learned some very valuable lessons on what not to do from this bos.
We tend to focus more on the negative than on the positive...thats a soft skill i think we all should try and develop. Seeing the positive instead of the negative in a situation.
I found these statistics and thought I should share:
ReplyDeleteGender
In terms of gender, the Workplace Bullying Institute (2007) states that women appear to be at greater risk of becoming a bullying target, as 57% of those who reported being targeted for abuse were women. Men are more likely to participate in aggressive bullying behavior (60%), however when the bully is a woman her target is more likely to be a woman as well (71%).
Race
Race also may play a role in the experience of workplace bullying. According to the Workplace Bullying Institute (2007), the comparison of reported combined bullying (current + ever bullied) prevalence percentages reveals the pattern from most to least:
1.Hispanics (52.1%)
2.Blacks (46%)
3.Whites (33.5%)
4.Asian (30.6%)
The reported rates of witnessing bullying were:
1.Blacks (21.1%)
2.Hispanics (14%)
3.Whites (10.8%)
4.Asian (28.5%)
The percentages of those reporting that they have neither experienced nor witnessed mistreatment were
1.Asians(57.3%)
2.Whites (49.7%)
3.Hispanics (32.2%)
4.Blacks(23.4%)
Marital status
Higher prevalence rates for experiencing a hostile work environment were identified for divorced or separated workers compared to married workers, widowed workers, and never married workers .
Education
Higher prevalence rates for experiencing a hostile work environment were identified for workers with only a high school diploma or GED and workers with some college education compared to workers with less than a high school education.
Age
Lower prevalence rates for experiencing a hostile work environment were identified for workers aged 65 and older compared to workers in other age groups.
Industry
Among industry groups, workers with higher prevalence rates of a hostile work environment, compared to all adults employed at some time in the past 12 months (8%), were in Public Administration (16%) and Retail Trade industries (10%). Lower prevalence rates of a hostile work environment were reported among those working in Construction (5%); Finance and Insurance (5%); Manufacturing (5%); and Professional, Scientific, and Technical Services industries (6%).
Occupation
For occupational groups, workers in Protective Service reported a higher prevalence rate (25%) of hostile work environments compared to the prevalence rate for all adults employed at some time in the past 12 months. Workers in Community and Social Service occupations also experienced a relatively high rate (16%). Lower prevalence rates were observed among Architecture and Engineering (4%), Computer and Mathematical (4%), Business and Financial Operations (5%), and Construction and Extraction (5%) occupations.
Good research Grace!
DeleteGrace
DeleteI love to see how we as a company get involved in this. I am in the unfortunate position to be on the road most of the day so i dont really have time for doing some research.
I salute you in this because it is interesting although most of this was done in the US i think.
I wonder what it will show here is SA
How about this..I am just puting it out there.....
ReplyDeleteWhat about if we look for someone that is being bullied and help them to get it stopped without them knowing.
Look in your own workplace for who bullies who and do a survey on you own work space and get a survey going of our company.
Stay positive and look for the positive.